Quique'd Out of the Mastella

Valencia fans relish the prospect of Jose Mourinho taking over their club and being subsequently dismissed. “It took Chelsea a little over two years to run him out of town. We can run that motherfucker out of town in half the time with our mouths taped,” said long time socio Victor Nadal.

The rumor mill is heavily linking the Special One with the job at the Mastella after Quique Sanchez Flores was fired at 4 AM CET by sporting director Miguel Angel Ruiz after two embarrassing defeats to the Norwegian side Rosenborg and the Andalucían club Sevilla. Although Los Che sit fourth in the La Liga table, it was not enough to save the job of Quique who becomes the third casualty in four years, despite two top four finishes. Ruiz has stated that he wants a big manager as a replacement because “I want to make my mark on this club by firing a famous manager, not some schlub.”

Sanchez Flores, who won an internal political battle this summer with the previous sporting director, seemed to have time on his side after seeing off Amedeo Carboni. However a sterling start to the season was not enough for the ambitious club, who desperately want a return to their glory days, which is rather hard to pinpoint, seeing as one of Spain’s richest clubs have only won the league six times.

Mostly it comes down to the Valencia fans, which have never turned on a manager in the history of the club. When they uncharacteristically started booing Quique, management knew it was time to see off the manager they had put their wholehearted faith in this past summer. Quique, for his part, blames the lack of funds afforded him as he was unable to attract his most coveted targets Wesley Sneijder and Rafael Van der Vaart. The two Dutchmen would have helped his stagnant offense, but they were both steadfast in their refusal to move to the club.

Meanwhile, Bernd Schuster has asked for Wednesday’s game between Real Madrid and the team he calls “der Tod des Trainers” to be moved. Schuster, who spends most of his time perusing conspiracy theory chat rooms, is worried that because Valencia and its last two opponents have all seen coaching changes within the past 7 days, he has something to be worried about. Considering Real’s current position in the table, he may have reason to be concerned.