Arsene Wenger has compared the way clubs fire their managers to the practice of burning witches at the stake. And the Arsenal gaffer has vehemently come out against the horrible genocide taking place against these Premier League managers. While many try to avoid the uncomfortable subject, in hopes that it will go away, the Frenchman has gone on record against the holocaust that is taking place in England as managers are being dismissed with hefty severance packages and given positions of punditry. Rightly comparing this evil practice with the witch hunts that killed upwards of 60,000 women during the Reformation, Wenger has lashed out at the powers that be for allowing six managers to be fired from their cushy million pound jobs. He hopes that by speaking out now more managers won’t be murdered and raped over religious ignorance.
Make no mistake about it: managers are suffering a sex based pogrom, based on a holy war between two sides arguing over indulgences. Following Billy Davies dismissal from Derby County, he was subsequently set atop a pile of wood and set afire, screaming the entire time for mercy until he was dead. While the press has kept quiet on the subject, Little Sammy Lee was drowned in cereal bowl while inquisitors tested to see if he was tactically astute by seeing if he could float. Martin Jol, who has been linked to all kind of jobs, hasn’t taken any precisely because he was sent to the gallows. Nobody wants a fat headless man leading their squad.
All of this has Rafa Benitez mightily worried as his many layers of fat will make drowning an impossibility that may lead to him being pressed to death. Or getting a cushy job in Munich. Only time will tell. But rest assured that no matter Rafa’s fate, Arsene Wenger will be working diligently to ensure the next generation of Premier League managers are not subject to a “final solution”.
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